I recieved “Paradise”, the Dresden Dolls DVD today. Actually, three of them. Don’t know why Em sent me three, but… whatever. If I find someone deserving I will give them one. The extra two, even though unnecessary for me to possess, I will find difficult to part with for some reason. (I’ve already been asked for one of them, signed by my name on the folder credits. I found that quite rediculous.)

The memories it brought back are beautiful. I’ve given so little thought to all of that exquisite mayhem due to the pandemonium that my life became after it, but Gods – seeing all of their faces again – my children, my friends, my life for a brief period of time – brought such a warm smile to my heart that at times I found the love and beauty I remember from those days leaking from my eyes and being caught my the subtly upturned corners of my lips. (I love the taste of tears shed in happiness, and hungrily suck them down…)

Yeah, I’m a sentimental sap, but the memories are true and good, and let me remember that at least one point in time of my life, I did something good. I nurtured, I encouraged, I gave the words that helped doubts dissapear, I let people remember that they were loved and appreciated – and they did so much more for me. I found a purpose there, and retain that deep in my heart.

There it is – the magic we created together, definite proof of something I did that made thousands of people all over the world happy – and I’m not so anonymous anymore. Something that I can watch at will. A strange little time capsule, for me.

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