The thoughts are always swarming inside, followed with scattered words.
This is the part I am most uncomfortable with. The part that I always have been, even when asking for support to live.
This is not me. not who I see myself as. Perhaps when the book is completed – if it is able to be published, then the tides will turn and it will be my gift to you… I will be my gift, me – and so much more.
But for now, there is the loathing of having to ask, and in attempting to construct the request I am left with a full mind and empty page…